Tuesday, February 17, 2009

David's Current Mood: Anger.





Ok, so you are Jack Ely, the singer of Portland Oregon's own watered-down Wailers, the Kingsmen. Now, you ain't no sap. You've been kickin' the shit just long enough to know that playing this Rock and/or Roll junk in some crappy little band is just never going to cut the mustard. Taking matters into your own adolescent hands, you drop your band mates like a two-dollar pistol (or, if it pleases you, a twenty dolla' ho) for the life-affirming embrace of college (Yuck!)

There you are, on the fast track w/ your keggers and your Cardigans, when a certain Boston DJ blows the dust off one of your previous band's old singles and Bang! You ex-band mates got America by the short-hairs w/ their hit version of Richard Berry's 'Louie Louie', and you got 'Advanced Calculus' and your dick in your hand.

But not to fear! Your old band would always take you back right? Wrong! They are, after all, the mighty Kingsmen, and even though you sneered your way through their hit single, they tell you, in a decidedly kingly fashion, to hit the bricks before they crown ya.



So, picking yourself up and dusting yourself off, you do the only thing a musician of that time could do, you form your own goddamned Kingsmen, and when that doesn't pan out you rustle up some 'Courtmen' and cut your own 'Louie'(b/w a catchy little instro dubbed 'David's Mood') on the McCoy's old alma mater, 'Bang!' Records, and what happens next?

I'll give you a hint: THEY SPELL YOUR FUCKIN" NAME WRONG ON THE DISC!

Still...I guess it could be worse. I mean, you could be Pete Best. Poor Pete.

David's Mood - Jack Eely & the Coachmen


6 comments:

Devil Dick said...

well played lad, well played.

Devil Dick said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
The Wolfmen said...

Ian 'Stu' Stewart of the Stones is another - getting bounced, well backroomed, at the 11th hour too

The RedBoy said...

That's true. Forgot about Stewart. Only other 'Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda' that comes to mind would be Terry Reid - ditching Zepplin to launch his solo career. I wonder how that turned out...

Mondo said...

And in a punk way Sid Vicious

Vivienne Westwood mentioned to McLaren, that a striking, spiky haired 'John' - a regular at their shop - would make a perfect frontman for the still forming Sex Pistols..he approached Lydon - she'd meant John Beverly aka Sid Vicious

Later Sid was asked to audition as the singer for The Damned, but never turned up and Dave Vanian got the gig..

The RedBoy said...

Wasn't Lemmy in the Damned too for a hot minute? Music truly is incestious, no? Makes me wonder if any of these bands know Kevin Bacon.