Thursday, October 8, 2009
Blues for the RedBoy presents: She's A Haunted Betty Boop!
Made this mix with my own two hands for a certain Sister who, at the time, was as blue as a robin’s egg. Hopefully it did the trick and lifted her outta her doldrums. With a little bit of re-purposing, I’m sending this out to all those peculiar chicks and the men who go gooey for their ghoulish antics. See, behind every man is a good woman (or, if you are a smooth operator, several), though one cannot necessarily guarantee that that woman is not holding a carving knife or a spool of piano wire. Face it fellas, these witches keep you on your toes, if not by virtue of the rope they got slung around your neck, then by that weird whammy they got workin’ day in/day out. There isn’t much we as hot-blooded beasts wouldn’t do for a shot at that cauldron they got bubblin' between their knees, but don’t be fooled fellas…you are not in control. You may think you got the upper hand, but you are just one muttered hex away form frog-city. Give a spin and celebrate these weird sisters, warts and all, but do it with a rosary on your lips and your back to the wall, lest you wind up in the soup (literally)
You Are My Girl – Three Stooges
I can only assume this is not thee Three Stooges, however, there may just be at least one self-styled ‘fake Shemp’ involved in the production and execution. Cool tune about the endearing qualities of a monstrously ugly fiend who moonlights as a card-carrying member of the fairer sex.
Miss Frankenstein – George Jackson
In keeping w/ a general theme of skin-deep scarification, here is a mystery tune from 62’ about a butta faced Philly who requires a pork chop be tied around her spindly neck to facilitated some doggy love. Featuring ex-members of Baltimore Maryland’s vocal sensation the Plants. It’ll grow on you (Get it!?)
Vampira - Bobby Bare
This 1958’ cut by Ohio C&W legend Bobby Bare (aka. All American Boy Billy Parsons) has made the rounds for awhile now, but as anybody from Jersey knows, there is somethin’ to be said for “Two inch nails, micro waist, w/ a pale white feline face...” Any self-deprecating ghoul w/ “Inclination eyebrows” is free to suck my…neck, any time. Released on Challenge records subsidiary ‘Jackpot Records’, today might just be your lucky day (Get it!?)
Tombstone # 9 – Murray Schaff
Wanna hear something’ weird? While scheduling this post I realized that this test pressing was cut 53 years ago today (Don't beleive me? Check the fine print). Coincidence…I think not! Perhaps it is an ill omen? The lesson at hand: don’t give in, fellas! Even though these womens got the hard sell and are willing to give out free samples, you may just wind up at the business end of a post hole digger. According to particulars this tune was slated for release on King records, though I have never come across a copy proper. Anyone?
Queen of Halloween – Bily Snel
Here’s an obscure two-sider (see later posting for the flip) outta NY state which has eluded most comp-cobblers for awhile. Most of the copies that turn up are new-old stock, so chances are these beauties have been living out their existence in a tradesman’s closet. Good thing I am not above accepting anonymous charity.
Draculena – Aaron McNeil
This 1964 soul styling is in the same sanguinary vein (pun intended) as the above mentioned Bobby Bare disc. Though of a decidedly later comportment, ‘Draculena’ throws a littler Voodoo into the mash w/ some Marie Laveau inspired femme fatality. Hell, I'd follow Draculena to her grave.
Headless Nightmare - Villagers
A weird folksy number from 63’ concerning an ex-girlfriend who earned her ‘post’ status by getting her noggin’ clipped off by a speeding train. As can be expected, such a death rarely results in eternal rest, and more often than not insures a white-clad specter swinging its missing extremity down the tracks for all eternity. Get some new shoes, Daddy. Step on it!
Witch Girl – Ron Walden
One of my current favorites, Witch Girl has been piloting her broom under my radar for some time now, though how that’s possible w/ such a trashy solo is beyond me. Say what you will, but the devil knows how to pick them, I just wish Ole' Slue-foot could furnish me with some more info on this killer track.
Vampires Ghost – Jimmy Bowers
Never trust the ghost of a vampire who “Plays Cards Like a Man” not only will you loose your shirt, but you are bound to loose your white-bread soul in the process, and there aint nothin’ a self-respecting vamp likes more that white bread soul w/ a little dab of mayo and a barrel pick - no garlic, please.
So there you have it folks. If’un you wanna get down to brass tacks w/ yer baby, just slide this mix in, get down on one hoof, take her by the tentacle and tell her you’d marry/murder her all over again. Remember, you can always buy cemetery plots by the pair, and there ain’t nothin’ deeper than his and her graves, dig?
Blues for the RedBoy Presents: She’s a Haunted Betty Boop!
P.S. Stay wood kid, stay wood!